Brent “fun promotions” Walk

 Take time to enjoy the simple things in life.

Romantic Perversion

 

The smell of a new car, the first whiff of fried food, fresh air, the special scent of that stuff your significant other wears so well. the smell of....bah you get it..

You ever wonder who came up with that shit, shit soo alluring that it makes your senses flash and the engine light of your romantic triggers fire.

After a weekend in raw, and seeing all the happiness despite all the misery brought on by our favorite mother, it has T wondering time and time again, what in the gosh dam hell are the tire companies putting in there gravel tires to make folks open there wallets and give there hard earned dollars to the various treads that are meant for one thing, gravel roads.

Ok before the entire listening audience of 12 tune into Netflix hear me out on this.

In the defense of this rant. Gravel riding is unlike its predecessor ..

Cyclocross, where in fact a quiver of different tread compounds, and various casings can drastically change the out put for the day,  and to just like cyclocross Mountain bikes, casings, tread depth, blah blah blah.

But gravel roads? 

yea maybe, maybe not depends

Hopefully but doubtful the thick grip consumer has looked over a  few things before smelling the tasty bag of the various choices.

Where will I ride mostly?

Well dude, I’m doing this gravel ride, with a couple buddies that I mean ride a shit ton and we are gonna it up some gnarly farm roads. And maybe rip The DTE and Cannonsburg, and some fast farm roads..

What is the terrain like?

I don’t know dude.. but I want to be ready.

What will fit my bike?

Uh yea, cuz I bought basically the most recent and semi advanced gravel rig available, or something close to it.

What type of rider am I?

I’m kinda of just getting into it, but I plan on doing the Coast to Coast gravel thing, some CX racing, club rides with the local aggressive pricks, maybe some single track, and oh i like that thing called Lord of the Springs and possibly a Triathalon or even a Half Iron Man

What is my budget?

I can drop coin, but not at my local bike shop, because there is one dude that always drops attitude there.

This rant doesn’t go without a little justification, or actual knowledge, Ts butt is big but it ain’t to big to play around with handful of discarded rubber left by one local gravel dropout left on Ts stoop.

Specialized Roubaix tubeless ready 700-32-33

Vittoria Terreno Zero tubeless 700-38

Schwalbe G1 700/38 tubeless ready 

Vittoria Terreno dry 700/33

Panaracer gravel king slick 700/38

Specialized sawtooth 700/38 tubeless ready

Panaracer gravel king SK 700/38 tubeless ready

WTB byway 700/42 tubeless ready 

Specialized pathfinder 700/38 tubeless ready 

One of Ts neighbors who has much deeper pockets than T is constantly on the quest for the next big gravel erection . And never shy at leaving a milk crate full of sticky partially used discarded rubber on Ts doorstep. after stumbling over them and a few mis-fires, This grouchy old fart decided what the heck, Lets see what all this silly romance is about, and let love in.

After days of holding them feeling them and remembering when he was young, T got setting them up and preparing a little experiment.

The requirements?

• Mount them on the same wheel set
• Test them on a medium length  time/mile circuit, with a mixture pavement, chop-seal, gravel, (both chunky and fine)wet and gooey  mud, and smidgen of two track
• with appropriate air pressure to Ts fat ass, IE meaning within the normal standards
• Ride each set of wheels on the above route at a moderate to high aerobic pace.

Well dude I’m  waiting...

It’s should come to no surprise that of course the smoother style would outshine the more trendy ones, especially on hard pack or pavement, but what surprised even this old coot was how manageable they were even in the wet, farm roads, and goopy muddy stuff. Of course the corners were a different story, but even with the more gravel inspired tires it was a role of the dice as most lacked any shoulders to support railing turns and loose gravel transitions.

So in number forms here is what a person of Ts small life came up.

• Vittoria Terreno dry 700/33  15.8 mph, from the initial pedal stroke.. these felt slow and wobbly more of a dry condition  CX tire 
• Panaracer gravel king SK 700/38 tubeless ready  16.5 mph felt heavy and floppy on pavement, clogged up a bit in the deeper muddy side of the road stuff.
• WTB byway 700/42 tubeless ready 16.7 sluggish to get up to speed but once there felt like a second job to keep them in just constant momentum. 
• Schwalbe G1 700/38 tubeless ready  16.8 mph surprisingly nice feeling despite all the tiny nobs, but not supple at all, but  one  benefit they didn't clog up.
• Specialized pathfinder 700/38 tubeless ready 16.8 mph. Probably one of the best soft to loose cornering tires, but felt heavy and chore like to keep them at speed even on hard pack dirt. 
• Specialized saw tooth 700/38 tubeless 17.2 mph, rolled like a fat slick but more room for error. Corners nice and felt fairly supple, but still pretty heavy. 
• Panaracer gravel king slick 700/38 17.5 mph once up to speed felt fast enough to consider, but in slow corners with there big round profile felt like turning on a pillow 
• Vittoria Terreno Zero tubeless 700-38 17.6 mph probably the best all around tire for various shit T encountered washboard friendly, and fast smooth cornering was confidence inspiring 
• Specialized Roubaix tubeless ready 700-32-33 19.2 mph, hands down first pedal stroke the fastest tire, on hard pack and pavement, wet spray type dirt mud,  a little tricky in the soupy stuff but they didn't clog up like a the gravel king SKs did.

What’s to take from it? 

I don't know man...

If your ripping DTE, Doing Coast to Coast gravel and exploring the local loop The Roubaixs aint gonna cut it.

riding with dudes, and trying to keep wheels of the local aggressive pricks, small knobby 38s at 45 psi is going to have you hating all things in life..

Side note: of all the tires tested, The Specialized sealed up and seated with no gripes and loss of air on

 the first try. 

Spending a good grip on cool, stylish, and awed at real gravel inspired treads is sure more romantic than just getting some chubby slicks, that have been doing the job for decades with great results. 

don't buy into the hype. just 

Know your hype

 

T

 

 

 

 

 

 

 As an average adult, you mostly go out of the house to either earn money or spend money.

 

The Barry Roubaix

Barely Roubaix...Barely Alive..Barely legal...Barely employed....Barely listening...

Awe man you get my drift...

There it is..it happened..

grab a beer get warm, find your friends or meet new ones..you were just part of one of the..

Biggest 

Coolest 

Dialed

Best promoted 

And Quite possibly 

The most overlooked race in America..

Yeah, but that’s what Michigan has come to expect right? 

Hell to the outside bordering neighbors, you would think that the MichiganScene was solely comprised of either 60 hour a week dog loving, cat killing, wife beating, child hating factory workers, or unemployed human wasteoids..

But it’s not so fuc em

Although the platform has changed since its original conception, the look is still the same, um ok the look is not quite the same, The Barry Roubaix folks continue promote a product and produce an event that is second to none on all race platforms in the The Miscene. Oh sure much to chagrin’s of stout stalwarts yes to be fair it’s counterpart the ICEMAN is in the same realm, but man..take the ICEMAN and plop it down into a quiet mid Michiganscene town for its start and finish and then maybe..

The Barry Roubaix...if you are reading this you get my drift, Competitive, fun, happy, hard, epic, story filled, loved, dog friendly  respected, misunderstood, and only available in the Michiganscene..

If you don’t.

Thanks for coming if you think you have won an award, follow the yellow lines to the white tent a Barry Roubaix representative will guide you to your respected position.

Congratulations 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

1. Brake Pads, from 24.99  a wheel and up availability is scarcely limited from any local LBS
2. Headset bearings, prices vary depending on quality, https://wheelsmfg.com/
3. SupaCaz, Lizard Skin, or basic Cork price 18.99, available at Grand Rapids Bicycle company 
4. Gear and Brake cables,(for those poor non bee-boop folk) 24.99 and up available at American Cycle and Fitness
5. 5 to 9 dollars in nutritional products that are lost while fumbling in your pockets with frozen fingers 
6. Chains, Sram, Shimano, 24.99 readily available at most local bike shops
7. Cassette, 58.99$ and up cheaper through the internet than any local bike shop 
8. Garmin, or Wahoo head unit after being ejected due overlapping a wheels because your tired and blown and cant see through your over priced eye-wear  175$ and up, sold directly through the manufacturer, or can be had far less off Amazon 
9. Eye-wear after being discarded from the above mishap, anywhere from 9.99 to 300$, Best deals can be had on Instagram
10. Any Neon or brightly colored apparel, Barry mud will never come out of that stuff, wait till the club does a re-order, its the best deal 
11. Full bike tear down, less than 100$ if you do it yourself  150$ with bike shop bro-deal hook-up..twice that much at KLM bike shop
12.  Pro car dealing average cost 250$ after cramming your rig into the back of that Subaru out back
13. Ride Wrap, $80 bucks and up after trying to save that abused carbon frame, available at Ridewrap.com
14. Waterbottles, there cheap, and at best free wait until the next gravel race..
15. 250$ and up Date night with the significant other, to make up for coming home tired, grouchy and acting like a complete miserable fuck for spending the day away playing in the mud.

1103.92 plus entry fees

The Extreme Probable cost of Barry

BITD

 

Deliverance

 Ed: Ok let me get this straight, Louis you really think the attrition rate to this years "The Barry Roubaix" will be much higher than ever.

Louis: that's right Ed, machines are going to fail and people are going to fail.

Bobby, and what makes you think this so?

Louis: well chubby boy, Lets just say those fun loving high fivin gravel ridin people have been treated to some pretty tame Barry Roubaixs, hell hardly a rider can recall the near death year, shit half the folks in those waves this year weren't even ridin bikes back then.

Drew: that seems like an extreme assumption 

Ed: Very extreme  

Bobby: so that doesn't explain why you think folks are going to be DNFn and at worst case no showin.

Louis: why Bobby you see the world has changed quite a bit since those nasty days, folks have gotten well i hate to say it..soft, what with the whole Zwift riding and all the other indoor influences, some of those high paid hillbilly's don't even know how to dress for 45 degrees and sunny let alone 32 and spittin snow. Its gonna have impact trust me.

Drew: the problem with you Louis is you want to be one with nature and you cant hack it.

Louis: Drew do you believe in democracy

Drew : yes I do.

Louis: then we will take a vote, 

Bobby: I agree with you Louis 

Louis: Its up to Ed.. its all up to you.

Ed, Im with Louis. There will be more death and carnage than years prior. but not more than ever.

World champ Ashton Lambie is leaving the track and going off-road

 

The fastest man on the track is going for a change of pace in 2022.

Ashton Lambie, who set a world record of 3:59.93 in the 4km individual pursuit and then became world champion in the discipline last year, has announced that he’s switching gears to focus on off-road racing this year. The 31-year-old is teaming up with Jukebox Cycling, where he’ll join Adam Roberge, Dylan Johnson, and Alexey Vermuelen at off-road events throughout the country.

Adam Roberge, Phil Gaimon, Ruby West and three others headline new Jukebox Cycling team

Although Lambie’s been dedicated to the track, and more specifically the IP world record, for years, racing gravel and ultra-endurance is perhaps where his true love lies. In fact, it was after his record-setting ride across Kansas in 2016 that Lambie, from Nebraska, discovered riding on a velodrome.

It just happened to be a grass one.

Prior to joining USA Cycling’s national track program in 2017, Lambie competed in randonneur races and long-distance gravel events, like Unbound Gravel and The Mid South. After years of jumping back and forth between the track and gravel, he’ll now be able to turn his laser-sharp focus off-road.

Project Sub-4: My journey to set a world individual pursuit record

Lambie’s first race in the Jukebox Cycling kit will be the XC MTB race at the Sea Otter Classic on April 9. He’ll then attempt fast times at the subsequent races in the Life Time Grand Prix series, which includes the Leadville Trail 100 MTB race and Unbound Gravel.

In addition to the Grand Prix, Lambie will continue to explore the gravel and singletrack around his new home of Houston, Texas, where his partner and former track cyclist Christina Birch is part of NASA’s new class of astronauts.

 

 

Barry Roubaix weather.....