Pew…is that you?

 

Good evening friends one and all..what an incredible way to start the Michiganscene 2026 season. I don’t think we are even two weeks into the excitement, and I don’t know about you..I feel like  I need to catch my breath. 

What with all the hoopla and confetti thrown in the air the past few weeks…it seems like it has stirred up the turd stew slightly.

I’m not even sure which way to fan the air to clear out the stench…

But first I think the folks of Miscene..are in need of a refresher of sorts…not to be long in the tooth..if your a Strava user, Zwift type person or any other athletic app user, and you have faithful followers and friends that constantly give you kudos or ride ons, but you my friend never return the favor please if you have any balls at all I want you to replace your profile icon with that of the poop emoji..that little rap of recognition lets your faithful friends feel like there getting a virtual pat on the ass, a high five brotherhood for there pursuit of there endless goals 

Now to the center of the stink..

I know I’m going out on a limb

I know I’m gonna get the stink eye, the behind the back of grumble..the often fatal virtual turd fling..

But the smell was too much to keep closed up in one room…so here goes it…Without  picking on just one..this tip of the poop hat, goes out to all those hard working, dedicated highly skilled and talented, not to mention fully respected by me, and the entire scene..yep even the coolest people cast a stench once in a while.

The photographers that consistently document our joy. I know you’re upset about people stealing your work in many ways. But let’s face the facts. It’s gonna happen, not everyone has the bad intentions of stealing beer from your hand. Some it’s a simple grab it for the memory. It’s an age old thing, and if you are truly losing the farm on the few that get screen captured?  The simple solution it’s probably time to start water marking all of the images. I know that’s probably a big pain in the ass. But it will defer the stress of resentment after even your most loyal fans occasionally pick an image or two to share there experience.

And finally. Promoters, I honestly don’t think you need to keep reminding the participants, to not screen capture the images. We as children knew running in the halls was wrong, but we either ran out of breath or got tripped by Fred the janitor..

Excuse me I have to readjust my fan.

 

 

 

 How I feel when i see people still posting Barry Roubaix pics on Social Media 

 I wish I had stopped to savor it, the last time I saw a kung pow penis. I never knew it was to be my last

 

 

 

 

 

 

Do you think they rehearse these prior to race day?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Fuck you if you can’t take a joke

Hastings Michigan 

The beautiful people of Hastings

1. Ok..I gotta ask..did Connor Kamm lose a bet
2. Overheard…Were your teeth always that straight?
3. And White..holy cow gravel racers have the most perfect teeth.
4. Ben Whited still needs to be pushed off his bike. Just saying 
5. The trend of  puffy coats just got elevated to a whole nother level
6. Nah, bro it’s just the equivalent to the Starter jacket craze of the 90$
7. Yeah..but did you see that one dudes battle vest..decked out in bicycle patches?
8. The potty game was definitely on point thank you promoters.
9. Holy shit doesn’t anyone own a garden hose? Did u Fckn see the like to wash your bike off.
10. Come on man make that over priced bike rack look like it earned its keep by displaying that well dirty rig.
11. Believe it or not..the rim brake bike was in an abundance this year…very comforting
12. Overhead..36 is the new 62…eeeerrr 65
13. Good thing ICE was busy in Ann Arbor, there were other skin colors than white in Hastings 
14. The Hastings Rotory club are the nicest people 
15. Overhead..17 dollars for smash burger..!
16. Riders riding in support for other riders…I dunno I kinda feel like the grave community it’s tread in the creepy waters of the road scene..
17. Speaking of Puffy team Jackets…100 bucks says the team Turbo sends it over the top real soon.
18. Ian Boswell makes the Michiganscene hard men look like rookies in the 100 killer thriller thing
19. I’m the only one that just likes normal beer and not something that takes a pumpernickel rye.
20. Over heard.Hey bro watch it you just spilled 3 ounces of Black Rocks on my Hokos 
21. Many Stalwarts were completely no shows.
22. Tim Bober was in charge of babysitting Oliver
23. Rumor has it an E-bike catagory may be on tap for 2027
24. Dear screwball riding a single speed bike in jeans in a flannel shirt doing wheels riding like a complete obsessed maniac, please give me the number of your drug dealer as I want in on some of the sweet jak 
25. Despite being sloppy goopy, soft and tangy..the Phart still didn’t look like they were living life.
26. Everyone looks so fresh for the first 35 minutes.
27. Overhead, I should have done the 18 mile.
28. That pizza looked good.
29. We’ve said this a thousand times, hanging out waiting for the podium in your race sunglasses looks ridiculous, have the proper style to have the casual pair handy.
30. To the dude that was wondering around the after party with a Black Rocks in both hands in street clothing, but wearing your mud encrusted helmet and face still covered in half of Barry county…you looked like you needed a friend.
31. Hill Killer is the absolute commander of the Barry SS
32. How many times has Colin Snider podiumed Barry?
33. SJD looked cold
34. More fire pits please..
35. Rumor has it the promoter added a 5 dollar increase to every entry to cover the possible carnage of the Barry warmup around the side streets 
36. I didn’t even see Butt Crack Jenny.
37. Rumor has it…John Meyers skipped the podium because he was having a temper tantrum 
38. Like there was no Adams medicine team present?
39. No Caffeine Soul either
40. And no Sweet Bikes either…sad face
41. Diego Flores…yep he wasn’t there either 
42. Someone was mumbling about how everyone rides bikes averaging 3/4K 
43. Poor people don’t do Barry
44. Overhead, I haven’t ridden in 3 weeks 
45. Man bro..there’s an awful lotta bread in those threads
46. I felt completely misplaced…I own nothing Rapha yet
47. Most Gravel riders are always willing to help 
48. Overhead. Tandem…it only seems kinky the first time 
49. I forgot my shoes 
50. My hero number two was the young girl on the Trek 820 from 1993 with the biggest smile 
51. I tried to steal a Barry banner…
52. No two people wear the same socks
53. Or Sunglasses 
54. Give yourself two extra cool points if you arrived with a waxed chain
55. Add 15 more if arrived with a waxed body part
56. Dear rider number 1013 who sat in on your group for the entire race never taking a pull or sticking your nose out in the wind only to jump the entire group with 200 meters to go to win the field sprint for 172 place, your Turd award will be mailed to you.
57. To the Three Emo corner marshals, it would have been nice if you would have put down your vape and knew your left from your right.
58. Overhead…at least it’s not dusty 
59. That dude on the yellow 70s Schwinn varsity…mad respect 
60. Dan Yankus didn’t have the day he was hoping for 
61. Never touch someone in the middle of fixing a mechanical without asking 
62. Poop glasses..enuf said
63. People doing wheelies 
64. People performing unnecessary bunny hops
65. Bobbie Munro the most unassuming fast guy
66. Cosdi group boycotted the whole day
67. Overheard...i always do better when it’s wet.
68. To whoever that was blasting Nickleback in the ACE hardware parking lot…you got balls
69. Can we get some updated awards please
70. Shaw and Sager are far less intimidating when it’s muddy 
71. The elitist gravel attitudes are slowly getting taken over the fun seekers
72. More kids than ever before 
73. Surprisingly less dogs though..
74. The once close to be Gravel King, Nick Stanko..had a yucky day
75. Base Media…are they still a thing 
76. Kroske stayed in bed
77. So did the Pony
78. Yep Docsavage too
79. No BA.
80. No Jimmy Mac
81. So did about 100 other racers
82. Stop riding with ear buds…it’s dumb 
83. No two people do that thing with there fingers that people that like metal music do
84. No one makes people smile more than Rob
85. I had van envy all day
86. I thought I smelled Corey Stanges helmet! but it was just the overwhelming odor coming from the porta potty
87. That first gravel sector on the roll out…wow why was everyone braking 
88. Overhead…checked that one off the list.
89. The hand cycle guys…mad props
90. So many people so little time 
91. Riding two a breast …silly gravel people 
92. Death everywhere 
93. I’m now hooked on Scratch gummies
94. Despite the grip going to a great cause, not getting That preferred parking wasn’t a major issue 
95. There were kids out there with bikes worth more than the car I drove up in.
96. Lotsa Rapha…I thought that company was long gone
97. Where old jerseys get another chance.
98. TMS gave away over a hundred stickers
99. As always packet pick up was easy peasy 
100. 
     

The stuff you saw, and some you missed….

 

Every gravel racer’s Tinder profile 

 

The sense of attainment of objects of desires also will not give happiness. 

This gives bondage.

IT IS ABSENCE OF DESIRE WHICH BRINGS HAPPINESS.

It is only desire which disturbs eternal peace and rest.

This desire is the disease of mind, live without it, and be happy.

Happiness is true Self and is always Here.

The prescription for this Happiness is to simply be Quiet.

~ Papaji

 

 

 

 

Winning a Subaru courtesy of Fox motors never felt better….Barry Roubiax, 2026

 

 

Anne Caroline Chausson, Mont Saint Anne, Canada, 1998

 

First-ever team time trial at Tour de France Femmes set for London in 2027 and 'will feel surreal' for British riders as details for opening trio of UK stages revealed

 The Tour de France Femmes avec Zwift 2027 will begin in the UK with organisers ASO announcing the details of the first three stages held from July 30 to August 1, including a debut team time trial on the streets of London moving into France.

“The Team Time Trial has always been one of the most exciting and spectacular formats in cycling, and we are very proud that the first one in the history of the Tour de France Femmes avec Zwift will take place in London," said Marion Rousse, race director of the Tour de France Femmes in an official announcement on Monday.

"The United Kingdom has already shown its passion for the Tour, and these stages will once again showcase the energy of the crowds, the beauty of the landscapes and the growing importance of women’s cycling on the world stage.”

The Tour de France Femmes avec Zwift is schedule for July 30 to August 7 next summer. The opening stage 1 will feature an 85.7km race from Leeds to Manchester, while stage 2 will take the peloton on a 154.4km race from Manchester to Sheffield. The Grand Départ will conclude with a debut team time trial that will cover 18km in London, finishing on The Mall.

ASO had already confirmed that the Tour de France and Tour de France Femmes will both start in the United Kingdom in 2027. The men's race will start in Edinburgh and will feature stages in Scotland, England and Wales from July 2 to 4 before crossing into France, and mark the fifth time that the Tour has visited the UK – after Grand Départs in 2007 and 2014, and stages in 1994 and 1974.

2027 will therefore mark the first time that the men’s and women’s Grand Départs have been hosted in the same foreign country with the women's event beginning in Paris in 2022, Clermont-Ferrand in 2023, Rotterdam in 2024 and Vannes in 2025.

“Having the Tour de France Femmes avec Zwift so close to home feels like a full circle moment for me. I watched the men's race in 2014 from the side of my home roads as a young kid, and now I hope to have the opportunity next year to line up and race in the peloton," said British talent Cat Ferguson (Movistar).

"I truly appreciate how far women’s pro cycling has come. If I can inspire some women or young girls, even in a small way, to get out on their bikes, that would make me very happy. I know that UK fans will make this an unforgettable experience for all riders. Bring on the 2027 Grand Départ.”

Flora Perkins (Fenix-Premier Tech), who competed in her firt Tour last year added: "I am genuinely so excited for the Tour de France Femmes avec Zwift to come to London, where I grew up riding my bike. To race the team time trial along such iconic roads and compete at the pinnacle of the sport in front of family and friends will feel surreal."

Stage 1 will start from Headrow in central Leeds, for the first-ever Tour de France Femmes avec Zwift stage to be held in Britain. It will be marked with three categoriesed ascents and one for the opportunits.

The peloton will pass through Headingley and the west of the city, crossing into Kirklees and passing through Heckmondwike and Mirfield to reach Huddersfield.

The route will head south to cross the Pennines, with the first categorised climb being Kirkheaton Hill (1.7km at 7.5%), followed by Meltham Hill (3.2km at 8.4%), before descending towards Oldham alongside Dove Stone Reservoir.

Stage 2 will bring the peloton another day of relentless climbing iwth seven categorised climbs across the 154.4km race from Manchester through Derbyshire and the Peak District National Park to Sheffield.

After Stockport, Marple and New Mills, the first challenges will come in the form of the unclassified climb up Long Hill before Buxton (34.6km).

The stage will feature nearly 3,000 metres of climbing, with ascents over Côte de Calton, Winnats Pass, Côte de Chunal, Snake Pass, and Côte de Bradfield before entering Sheffield to tackle Côte d'Oughtibridge and Côte de Jenkin Road before finishing on Attercliffe Common.

The riders will then tackle the Delph climb (2.1km at 6.3%) some twenty kilometres from the finish, before skirting the north of Greater Manchester via Rochdale and entering the centre of Manchester. After passing Manchester Cathedral, the finish line will be set up on Deansgate.

Organisers have offered limited details about the debut team time trial at the Tour de France Femmes, but confirmed that the teams will race along an 18km course that finishes on The Mall.

“Revealing the first two stages today and confirming London as the host of the first ever team time trial in the Tour de France Femmes avec Zwift is another exciting milestone on the road to 2027. From the climbs of Yorkshire and the Peak District to the streets of London, these stages will deliver incredible racing and unforgettable moments for fans," said Paul Bush, managing director for Grand Départ GB 2027.