Friday, October 31, 2014


1 Missy Giove
2 beating cancer
3 DI2 33K and no adjustments
4 embro
5 properly designed course without turns every 50 yards
6 psi on 33m tires lower than 27
7 Cook County "PinBall Playboy"
8 euro cross team kits
9 winning national titles 
10 winning from a field sprint
11 winning a race out sprinting your breakaway companions
12 small bikes
13 snoopy
14 Tailwinds
15 tall socks
16 gnarly run ups
17 the sound of a disc wheel at speed
18 campy
19 tall beers
20 RonC
21 properly setting up for a field sprint
22 thinking before you speak
23 shimano
24 5 watts/kilo for 20:00
25 BMATTER
26 Dybo
27 5 mile climbs
28 twist descents
29 Robert Heriman, (mainly in the 80's)
30 Kenny Stabler
31 any stylish matching kit from any year
32 chicks in flannel
33 Van Halens first
34 SJD
35 puking after a hard effort
36 legs with lact
37 groveling and still winning
38 Tomac
39 getting it in.........................................................no matter what
40 Lindsey Lohan
41 never knowing your mileage or speed
42 Kroske
43 50mm carbon wheels
44 carbon frames with slammed stems
45 Rihanna
46 Haters
47 Baywatch
48 cocaine
49 fire roads
50 the last minute and thirty seconds of Heaven and Hell by Black Sabbath
51 The Wiz.................................................................................................................................
52 mtbing  in the 90's
53 chicks on Bmx bikes....................................................................................................that spit
54 Lancia Stratos
55 dropping weight
56 dropping assholes
57 dropping.....
58 blowing up 50 meters before you catch the break
59 Brittany Spears
60 Owls
61 being quiet...................................................................................................................and fast
62 The Grayling Giant
63 cross bikes weighing less than 17 pounds
64 courses smoother than your girlfriends ass
65 T
66 switchblades
67 lil Pony
68 Danny K.............................................................................................................. (when he is around)
69 significant others that "get it"
70 black..................................................................................................... anything
71 creeping while others are sleeping
72 bell lap
73 living with little
74 Mila Kunis
75 listening
76 KIDA
77 new Sidi's
78 Sassy Grass Green Pro tour AAR Cudas putting out more than 700 horse power
79 rhythm
80 the Bunny
81 Led Zeppelin
82 proper fit
83 PBJ's
84 hip bones
85 3-Dviolet
86 sitting in playing for "the sprint"
87 riding...............................................................................................................................anything.....
88 Katy Perry
89 not giving a shit......
90 putting out less wattage and still beating dudes stronger than you
91 overcoming
92 Johnny Cash
93 hamburgers....................................................................... anywhere
94 riding singletrack while others are commuting
95 ignoring ignorant assholes
96 not being ignorant asshole
97 drinking lawn cutting beer with my friend Chris who made his year in July
98 living to 100
99 anything made by Honda..................................................................................................anything
100 Dion Sanders
101 Big M
102 Torque Thrust D's
103 Tommy Clark ..........................................................................................(only on Facebook)
104 Eva Green
105 Ennio Morricone
106 Hermit Crabs
107 adapting
108 SIMONSTER
109 Legends and Whiskeys
110 Brinke Stevens
111 Polished lugs
112 The White Stripes
113 winning state championships
114 riding more................................................................ talking less
115 earning it and not expecting it.
116 doing it for the "right" reason
117 telling the person that needs to be told to........................... "fuck of"
118 the proper amount of cleavage
119 Shrek
120 The Who
121 the Black Ace
122 Pizza
123 Pappa T
124 BRX
125 the truth  and.....
126 being able to handle it.......................................................................and not crying like a lil bitch.....
127 STFU when you should.......... should shut the fuck up...........
128 Cinderellas    Night Songs
129 Smarties
130 Milford crit
131 the cougars that hang out there
132 Burning shit .......................................................................................................(especially plastic)
134 using your one punch your given each year on that fuckhead really deserves it.
135 the Hanson Bros
136 not butting in on peoples conversations see #22
137 Steve McQueen
138 F1 racing (in the 70's)
139 winning solo
140 Kyuss
141 Meat Wad
142 Brasil
143  bib shorts
144 The Donnas
145 The German
146 Dybo again
147 808's
148 Chole Sevigny
149 TIMMYF
150 skinsuits
151 birthday suits
152 going solo
153 going sockless
154 going tubeless
155 going bra-less..............................................................................(excluding woman from Taylor)
156 going top less
157 bacon
158 perfect eyewear
159 spending time.................................................................... not money
160 evolving
170 Hoffeners kit
171 Lemmy.................................................................................................................fuck you
172 ICEMAN.....................................................................................................................afterparties
173 matching Animal Print undergarments                                                                                               174  Slayers 1st  
175 Dialed drive trains
176 never quitting
177 handlebars mounted on the headboard of your bed
178 Big-wheels ..............................................................................................(only if your under 10)
179 Darth Maul
180 Joan Jett
181 the lil Pony punching Saari out
182 Bostons "more than a feeling"
183 the sound of hopped up  two stoke engine........................................................... pre 1980
184 the smell of high octane fuel
185 Jimmy Page
186 Kate Moss
187 sram chains
188 bacon again
189 Black Sabbaths Paranoid
190 the speeder bike scene in Star Wars
191 the last patrol
192 Killing Islamic bastards
193 Kind Strong Bars
194 Fast courses
195 a clean bike
196 wind
197 riding solo fast
198 doing intervals instead of strava
199 Group B
200 Niki Lauda
201 never dabbing


Bad Ass shit.................thanks to all those that made this list possible...




Thursday, October 30, 2014

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

If i had a million dollars....


A few nights ago..after i made my stop at the border..after i kicked a few cans, brushed away a couple random hypos.....i parked my worn out ol tired butt on a curb in the lot adjacent to my local liquor plaza....among the junkies, dope fiends..the couples..the bums..the workin stiffs... the local whores...and even a few folks I see at the gym.....i sat chewing that grilled stuffed and swilling my favorite Friday tallboy...in the distance a late 90's Ford Taurus pulled up...the Bare Naked ladies song came from the the open door...den sometin caught my eye.... two not too shabby broads leaning against the only light pole in the lot rubbin one off.............i watched and listened to them get excited over the $20 spot they just won and how god dam happy they were and how they were gonna spend it on another..I sat ............my mind drifted on to how some folks probably couldn't even tell who's on a 20..not cuz they aint rich enuf..hell 20.s are so far down there dollar chain..pocket change walkin around grip...but to these it was like they just won a million dollars...and then like a dream... i got to thinkin  cuz i know what 20's look like..what i would do with a million bucks..of course the first thing comes to mind..after i initially thought i should enroll myself in some grammar classes..but i said fuck that shit..everyone needs haters.....and like many things i like multiples...buy shit..like a big ol pad..Cadillacs from every year prior to 1974..Id get my Atlanta friend a few body mods she thinks she needs...id through badass barbecues.maybe buy that million dollar arm id been spying....have 50cc dirt bike races in my back yard..pimp a big ass yacht equipped with two blond strippers on  deck..and id call it "Last Patrol"...take a couple of vacays..instantly Bora Bora came to mind..a restaurant on the beach with a sand floor so i can eat without shoes...late knight dips..yea my mind wandered to all those material things..over priced watches ...over printed shirts, designer jeans,  fast cars, booze... babes...Vegas..things i go without but i  see others so free and easy roll with..like breathing...but then something started creeping into grey matter..somethin soo freakishly absurd and completely outlandish..i couldn't help myself but let my mind wandered and float with it...like a dream..i entertained it...how i would try to fix the Michigan scene....ya know how dreams go....i dreamed on..................................................................

Hold my Mountain Dew imma try sumptin

Friday, October 24, 2014


1. its going to be a much milder winter, training will be much easier...get  your excuses ready..
2.its a crime not to have a crit in Ann Arbor mid summer
3.bring back Allen Park............. i haven't broken any wheels in a few years
4.if your riding 10 hrs a week you don't need no stinking winter break..........................shit
5.wonder what the Wiz is doing.......................................................................:/
6.Carbon Fiber is proof there's a god without a soul
7.The Eagle is one knowledgeable dude...and he ain't afraid to share it!
8.whats the First rule of fight club?
9. If  your bitching about getting beat by the "sprinters" put there asses in the wind, gap em off or punch them out..just stop crying "sitting in".................................................................................... fuck!
10. Wherever the top Michigan racers travel to they post results
11.quit peacocking about dropping your crew on training rides
12.ICEMAN  a 3500 rider shit ride where 100 riders race for the win
13.Cross is fucking hard................period
14.where does everyone disappear to when its over
15.find your neighbors here  http://whitetrashjetsetter.tumblr.com/

Thursday, October 23, 2014

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

90 seconds adrift


The things you hear when you got good ears..the things that get tossed around at 1:30am...

Standing inline behind this 30 somethin attractive long hair skinny broad at the Tits and Ass Travel center.."thats TnA" for you sensitive folks..standing in line double fistn two luke warm Icehouse tall boys and  wrestling a bag of Funyuns under my good arm.. i have nothin but time to eaves drop on the convo that she is carrying on with her stunningly good lookin man..i didnt get the full jist of the story..but i did catch the line.."when your Karma is rising you just cant lose" ..I know im old..not in the "in" loop..the last time i had a couples vacay involved the Northwoods Inn, a cue ball and woman with two Bassett hounds..but that all being what in gods good name does Karma rising mean?..dont have a smart phone so wasnt  google ready...what the hell is that shit...but...i gotta think its just one my life's mystery's..things i dont need know...or just should write. off.....as unexpalnable...I say this  cuz in those brief few moments standing in line listening to these words...my mind moved from this to that to The Results of two days ago Peak to Peakin...i gotta say haters..im a lil uwstruck..not that Im surprised the Wisco kid won the big money and who won the old farts class that Jim James fool aint never gonna die he is like that dam movie with that Wilfred Brimley sucker..cocoon..
awstruck in a way that it was not better well attended...maybe it aint just a "cross thing"..maybe its just a low in the sport..hell i could do a Friday 15 and then some on the MIA's and go aways that had happened in the past twelve months..me included...maybe passion takes pass on goals..aint nothing wrong with that in T's book...i just hope i aint the last kid on playground..or the guy talking about when he used to run...or the dude wearing his varsity coat to his sons homecoming game..no my only hope after all this poorly written crud is done and is a fleeting faint memory to those who dont care in the first place.. i can still write my one story no matter where....what or when...

dam the things your tiny little grey matter can do in less a minute and half

Friday, October 17, 2014


1.Kandahar
2.Island Lake Xc
3.Fort Custer Xc
4.Big M
5.Springfield Oaks Xc
6.Brighton Rec stage race
7. Boyne Mt Xc
8.Garland Point to Point
9.Mike Cool big lap
10.Peak to Peak
11.Ithaca
12.Riverview Hammer
13.Any Pando
14. Addision Oaks pre 2002
15.Pontiac Lake Xc

Thursday, October 16, 2014

"life is Rad when you do Rad things"

Wednesday, October 15, 2014

Ocana, Van Impe,Zoetemelk and Merckx proof that Giants rode the earth
Eddy Merckx haciendo de las suyas
Un Crack!

Monday, October 13, 2014

the state of the state, origin of the feces and dinosaurs stuck in the void of Vietnam


I aint stoppin by fishing for hits..grammar is worse than ever..aint got no gun to your head..get my drift.........haven't read the latest on Tantra and i sure as hell haven't had any strippers inside my camper in the last three days..make sense? this is just a rant..as if flogging a dead horse with Kogels best  i didn't think it would go back to the origins..self titled self nick named and selfish SNAFU....all these apples don't far from our own tree fools...lets compare this ill composed turd to our current situation this ..and is a situation...dont be blind...I aint here hatin...im just trying to wrap my mind and the small minds of few others in my teeny tiny circle all the while holding back crocodile tears.....you got all this racing going on in around and not enough riders to even call it a success.....what happened..is it a just a Michigan thing..is it because we only border two..can we blame the Murder city..seems like the west side isnt as effected with this issue as much and for crying out loud its less 2 hrs away...have we gotten so lazy..and why in the hell can a guy on a fat tire bike beat the shit outta dudes on regular bikes at there own game..i gotta think if he  was on the "right" bike even Don could get a little lift off without recommend dosage. I aint no buckeye fan but man o man i sometimes sit in a  halo of green envy when i see the turn outs they pull...and then my mind wanders..to that ever revolving constant play list from the 90's...Hootie, Barenaked Ladies, The Tragically Hip.The Spin Doctors Steve Winwood.....oooh the Barenaked ladies for christ sake god save me..save me from..a fuckin swag bag of Hammer induced  worst case of cross gut  i ever had...watching three left over grunge tweekers hacky sacking and swapin stories..will it get better..will it re surge to a new more vivid time..will wearing the same jersey and short make you a team player..will you sacrifice your own inner driven ego... how about the pro deals..is it really a deal? or is it just another way to tell those who are ignorant to the world we breathe we are sponsored...sponsor..yea riiight.....im using we cuz im stuck in the middle of it...i heard someone say  few days ago...quoting a movie...y'all going to Vietnam and y'all gonna die...like booking flight on a doomed plane....the only way step off is step out..chasing chickens and making believe..its ok when time is running out .....dam im rambling and checking out on why even i checked in...
give it some thought...we need to find a way to save this shit before we all end up listening to the Barenaked ladies....
fuck that guy......Islamic bastard 

Saturday, October 11, 2014

Friday, October 10, 2014

right now

1.2002 gets noticed as an AAVC alternative to the tailwind series
2.2003 The Wiz is one of the few tailwind regulars to attend battles it out with Blair Dudley
3.2004. Tailwind throws it on the schedule
4. The series brings riders in from the west side
5. Saturn of  Toledo/cane Creek dream team put the beat down all others in the A race
6. Queen Anne is killing them
7. Dream Team member Jer Walker gets his first win
8. 2005 the Lil Pony wins with a size able gap over soon to be arch rival Mike Wissink
9 SIMIONSTER suffers his mechanical
10.Rachel Steele is still around
11 Patrick Russell grabs a fourth in C men
12.2006 SIMONSTER riding on upcoming ICEMAN form nearly takes down the once unbeatable Black Ace a broken chain is his only faultier
13. Tom Burke makes his first east side cross appearance riding an aluminum sling shot
14.Rachel Steelwins again
15 The Cyborg takes down DC
16. Osgood finishes near the bottom in C men
17. Foshag finishes 4:44 back from his teammate
18.2007 goes two day Marne starts her cross thing the womens field sees almost 15 riders
19 Corey Stange wins B mens Osgood is on the move
20 Joe Brown still winning
21.Some Tan Guy gets on the podium
22. Lil Pony and the Wiz trade elbows making some cry dirty riding against the now rivals
23.the Evil dude crashes first lap goes from last to fourth by the finish
24.Dc does infamous taunt off the line
25. Thom Barrett wins C men
26.Osgood is still moving up
27.now defunct Two wheel Tangos head honch finish last C men
28.2009 sees smaller fields the wiz in full effect winning both days
29. Osgood still on the Move
30. Verran is getting good
31 Lako is seen in the C men
32.Danny Gerow is coming on
33.JTP is now in the house
34. 2011 Das german is now here and he is breathing
35 the Wiz comes close
36 Melly Kelly wins the now  micro womens field
37 the A-Game comes down
38 Osgood has now started his strings
39.lil simon edges out the new Guy
40.The Future is now here

Thursday, October 09, 2014

"Happiness is a byproduct of function, purpose and conflict; those who seek happiness for itself seek victory without war"
William S Burroughs

Wednesday, October 08, 2014

Saturday, October 04, 2014

Friday, October 03, 2014


1.Motley Crue
2.white leather high tops or low cut black leather tennis shoes
3.late 1st hour
4.Poison
5.groups of three
6.shop class
7.black satin Jackets
8.Cinderella
9.walked the halls
10.stale smoke
11.Quiet Riot
12.Hated by Jocks
13.Disliked No one
14.tight jeans
15.now extinct