1. Limited the number of bikes you own
2. Requires a permit to vape
3. Restrictions on beard length go in effect September one
4. Cat 1/2 will be run solely separate from sketchy 3/4 group no matter the rider count
5. Buys the Taco Bell franchise 
6. Changes menu back to the 1986 issue 
7. Only allows two pizzas per household a week
8. No orgasms after midnight 
9. Owns the rights to Facebook 
10. Crit racing will now be a minimum of 90 minutes 
11. Deer hunting season is reduced to 5 days 
12. And is limited to hunting with a slingshot and a baseball bat
13. Abortion is now allowed up to 15 years 
14. Kid Rock is no longer allowed to ever fuckn produce another record 
15. You will be taxed on any penis longer than 4 inches
16. Restrictions on pickup truck height go into effect right fuckn now
17. All 16 ounce beers will come with no more than 12 ounces 
18. Buys the rights to Monster Energy 
19. Changes the Monster Energy color to Blue
20. Only fan pages can now only show bare stomachs 
21. Marriage between a man and a woman is outlawed 
22. Caught wearing pajamas in public is a 100 dollar fine
23. Wearing Crocs are now considered a felony 
24. Clipless pedals are now restricted in bmx
25. No front chainring during road race under 62 tooth
26. All Dodge Charger production ceased as of 2022
27. Viagra will be discontinued 
28. Side by sides are now no longer allowed in the state Michigan 
29. Any type of Doodle breeding is no longer a thing, and is deemed cruel and unnecessary  in all  48 states
30. Barry Roubaix has been cut to one length, 150 miles
31. ICEMAN moved to December due to climate change
32. Strava is now free to everyone
33. The senseless local legend award is discontinued 
34. Waterford and Gratten have been awarded UCI Sanctions
35. Takes over Fun Promotions and brings back a 8 race series 
36. Begins Charging a entry fee to ride at the DTE trail network on the weekends 
37. The wearing of any spandex at the above trail will be considered a misdemeanor 
38. Beef Jerky is now Vegan Jerky
39. Buys the rights to Mountain Dew, and changes the color to a light blue hue
40. Long Travel bikes are restricted at all mountain bike trails in Michigan
41. Caps the number of riders Base Media is allowed per season 
42. Enforces McDonald’s to keep the McRib on the menu all season
43. Takes over Zwift on line racing, and enforces the power to weight ratio 
44. Brings back Phart bike racing to the scene, but only in the months December thru February 
45. Ceases production of all pickup trucks for the remainder of 2022 fiscal year, and thus helping the gas supply issue 
46. Gives Terry Ritter a permanent retirement 
47. Creates and fully funds a UCI continental team for, Sam Junge.
48. Reversing time, the scene sees a reemergence of the Tailwind series for 2023
49. All children must be in bed and asleep before 8:30 Pm, or a fine of 75 dollars will be implied to there rotten parents
50. racing in jorts will be terms for a one year suspension 
51. Waxing of any female body part is now deemed illegal and if found with such will be fined 100 dollars 
52. No rim brake road bikes will be allowed in any USA cycling event
53. The Michiganscene blog is permanently shut off
54. Anyone found flying a confederate flag will be executed on sight

Fuck Joe Biden?

 

 Who won?

 

Come on maaaaaan

 

 

Tripper. Well Rudy...summer has officially arrived, campers are in the full swing of things, and the food just can’t no better...

Rudy: yea, Tripper can’t say I don’t have a little anxiety over the summer of 2022.

Tripper: how can have anxiety over summer it’s only the best time of the year to be young, and be young as a cyclist, or even any type of athlete for that matter.

Rudy: I know Tripper, but heck I haven’t even done a century ride yet this year, and seems like everyone I know is doing hundred plus miles at least once a week. 

Tripper: well rabbit why not? Seems like you got some good miles in so far, what’s keeping you from that ever elusive cycling century ride?

Rudy: because Tripper it bores the hell out of me, and to be honest I’m not sure I could do my daily chores after cranking out that long in saddle, I mean Tripper I have lots of other things to do.ya know. I think I would be shattered. Seeing everyone doing these rides has me double checking my self cycling worth.

Tripper: awe come on Rudy, stop romancing the long day in the saddle, stopping under shade trees, taking wrong turns, eating the best food Citgo has to offer. I’m not sure how your doing it. But if it brings joy, by all means rabbit keep doing it...

 People will camp in a nylon tent amongst total strangers but lock all their doors and windows around their neighbors

 Small bikes

 

America

 

 

 

 Tomorrow’s the Fourth of July for Christ’s sake and these beaches will be open.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Low turnout plagues UCI Gravel World Series event in Arkansas

 Highlands Gravel Classic was the first of two US-based gravel world championships qualifiers

In the days before the Highlands Gravel Classic, Mason McNeill and a friend were texting — both seriously and jokingly — about their chances of qualifying for the UCI Gravel World Championships.

“We did the math — so if there were 35 people in our category we needed to finish top 9,” McNeill said. “Seemed feasible with a good day on the bike.”

Although McNeill, 27, didn’t go to Highlands with the sole purpose of qualifying for gravel worlds in Italy this October — “I signed up because it was local and I try to do most of local races” — with a second place finish he did punch a ticket to the inaugural event. 

And, so did many of the other riders who participated in the event held near Fayetteville, Arkansas on Saturday, June 25.

The Highlands Gravel Classic

 The Highlands Gravel Classic was the first of the 12-race UCI Gravel World Series to be held in North America, and while participants raved about the course — 95 percent gravel, hardly any of it flat — the event suffered from low turnout. 

There were 1,100 spots allotted between the two distances on offer. The Highlands route was 70 miles, for men up to age 59 and women up to 49. The Farmers route was 52 miles, for men 60+ and women 50+. (Bruce Dunn, director of race promoter All Sports Productions told VeloNews that the age groups/race distances structure was dictated by UCI Gravel World Series.)

In the UCI Gravel World Series rulebook, worlds qualification is guaranteed to the top 25 percent of finishers in the men’s and women’s 19-34 age group and then to the top 25 percent in every age group (in five year increments) following.

Given that — and the event’s location in the bike mecca of northwestern Arkansas — one would think that registration would have filled quickly.

However, only 108 people signed up total, and according to the results page, 80 people finished the race.

Dunn, whose company also produces the Joe Martin Stage Race and the USA Triathlon off-road national championships, told VeloNews that a variety of factors played into the lack of marketing of the event, including the fact that the Gravel World Series calendar wasn’t announced until mid-March.

The UCI gravel worlds date and location was only announced two weeks ago. 

“First it was the delay on getting the UCI to approve Erwin’s [Vervecken, series coordinator] calendar. It got pushed again and again. Then I’m in the middle of Joe Martin. Two weeks later I’m promoting USA Tri gravel national champs. I had runway early, and then I had zero runway.

“So, I’m gonna throw myself under the bus a little bit, and Erwin, through a lot of circumstances, could not get it marketed the way he wanted to. We just said, ‘you know what, we’ll put our heads down and no matter what our attendance is we’re gonna knock it out of the park and have a big event for next year.'”

What the riders said

Participants noted the low attendance, especially in the women’s field. Although this made a worlds qualification more likely, it wasn’t necessarily welcome.

“I was very surprised,” said Lenny Ramsey, who won the women’s 30-35 category. “I would much rather have a larger women’s field. It became a solo ride which is fine because that’s what I do all the time anyway, but that’s the fun of gravel — to have people to ride with.”

McNeil noted that the contingent of well-known gravel pros was “conspicuously absent.” For anyone who follows the sport, it’s known that many gravel racers reacted to the news of a gravel world championship with disdain, stating outright that they would not participate.

Another factor that may have contributed to Highlands’ low turnout may have been conflicting events on the calendar.

ofia Gomez Villafañe and Lauren De Crescenzo, two pros who have both stated a desire to go to gravel worlds were at the Oregon Trail Gravel Grinder and USA Pro Road Nationals, respectively. So were Pete Stetina and Alexey Vermeulen.

Nevertheless, Payson McElveen, who was not at a different race over the weekend but rather home in Colorado, was unaware of the qualifier.

“Literally had no idea,” he said.

Rane Roatta, who placed third in the men’s 19-34 race, said that he hadn’t heard about the race either until a new friend he’d met at Unbound Gravel brought it up. He traveled from Miami to Fayetteville for the event and qualified for worlds in Italy.

Roatta said that he thinks the lack of marketing was the issue, but that it shouldn’t be a problem in future years.

It is strange, but I imagine that every race is gonna bring more attention to the other ones,” he said. “It’s a new sport in cycling. In five years, it’s gonna be unreal.”

The next UCI Gravel World Series event is Jingle GX on August 6th in Amana, Iowa.

 

1. Gas prices
2. My wattage 
3. Home values 
4. My bank account 
5. My weight 
6. My tolerance 
7. The cost of bacon
8. Water levels in the Colorado river
9. The demand for shimano 12 speed
10. The demand for used Time Trial bikes
11. The gravel participation 
12. The weekday worlds participants 
13. The value of a used car
14. The value of a road bike built pre 2019
15. Firearm sales
16. Greeting card sales
17. Men’s rights 
18. Women’s right

High/low