never forget

you know what they say....

1.health
2.friends
3.music
4.handlebars
5.wine
6.beer
7.fries
8.aqua-teen
9.small bikes
10.dreams
11.warm days
12.singletrack
13.flannel
14.not being a jerk off
15.breathing


Im thankful

be happy be Thankful B-Rad!

Like swimming in the sweat of million orgy's.

There aint too many things that gets in T's craw like getting woken from a soft hazy slumber of foggy lands with a flannel wearing Midwestern gal...wanna make T unhappy ..besides the fact those slacking ass's at Tailwind cant even post results in a certain time frame....that will do it..havin lift off and checking to see if he made it...."a no call no show" from that worn out ol bastard got me walking around this dimly lit place wringing my fist...but i got this shit i can punch it so none of you miss any chance keeping  folks happy makin bread..and kissing babies...Cross aficionados got there wish..Ma Natre gave em what they wanted...its hard to be original in a situation like this I aint calling that Psycho Saari thing a come back..fool still ridin the same ass yellow pads he ran back three god dam years ago..but being light and still having decent wattage will give you the nod...but aint calling it comeback till that throw back team puts him on the road...whatta about B-Rad...and Jgood...no love lost for thick ass dude you still haul...If had an award to give for power to weight ratio and still be able fuck shit up..Id have you on the top box signing plastic titties.....To say i had a small tear in the corner of my left eye would be an understatement..not seeing Burke get it this year had me near suicide watch..but i didnt make the call..The Hoe-fie kid is gonna be good...the scene needed him like some anon said months back...id have to say an award should go to him for the dude that saved tailwind elite cross 2014 thanks buddy....keep at it ..the podium has not seen a team sweep since the Old Blue Wave days..how Ironic that one of those fools was standing the Lil Pony smoother than all the Hennessy and licorice in my cupboard that guy is...dam...sucka probably had less than 19 in tubies....dam makes me day dream to wanna be with Beyonce ....and now unlike the anger erection that i woke with i feel alittle weepie....The Bunny in all his hardness got the thing he deserved the most...aint nobody harder than fool..even in the mud the dude rode like another worn out bastard puts it chainless...there is no better representation what hard work, sacrifice and dedication than the bunny i cant say no more cuz aint no more to say..

oh.................................and fuck yo grammar

for the record...this never happens to Isaac              I......I.....................um

soon violent ones..soon

Driftin OG style

If you have never won a championship you have no idea what i am talking about and thats ok...no love lost...not a smidge...If you have..i mean really really fucking have..(not because you were the first something or other in that cat).. i mean really kicked the shit outta those assholes..gas pedaled those fuckers to the ground  and rammed it down there throats type win......you know what im talkin about...nothing can compare to it..sealing the deal and quietly pointing that jesters to the naysayers...

nothing feels like that ever and you can feed off it longer than you can ever imagine...


get my drift.........................

No 203 on the Bad Ass list

you can just die... if dont get it.

stay away from black kitties, dont walk under ladders double check yo shit twice.." cuz you cant race without shoes or helmet fools"....and
god dammit stop listening to that shitty Spin Doctors C.D.

STFU

Ya know...Id like to personally kick every fucker in the balls that is in love with that whole.."racing cross in the mud is fun" quit pretending you are so euro as fuck that you like to spend your fucking money on drive train parts while  romanticizing the roots of cyclocross..you know when its fun you fucking wankers..about two fucking second when you win..and well since there aint too many of you winning that are in love with cross muddin...please do those that are  a favor......................................... shut the fuck up....it is part of the sport...and you deal with it like a man...you dont see any euro fuck smiling at 180 heart try alittle hard cuz.....it aint fun...

The Oil of love, and swimming in a zodiac lion's den

Good morning Goood Morning Good morning...

In between your post coital alignment..your afterglow your hangover your over priced wait too long a line latte...cartoons pre race..pre shit...web surfing... Freddie Cougar  downloading...waste some time and think about it...Its less than 24 hrs away haters..and if my memory serves me correctly its been 14 years since this fine city park home of miscne sweet ass under appreciated velodrome has hosted a USCF cross state championship..alot has happened since then fools...the cross scene was just starting to take hold Uncle Bobby was gettin on board driving that big home schooler gas guzzling Econoline travling back east to see how the pros handle a booming sport..no one rode plastic bikes..except Frankie..do Mountainbikes count? they did back then cuz Frankie rode one to third place behind the Pony and Scotty Q earlier in the series....tubies and double bikes were few and far between..the courses were still very traditional euro like not a turn every 50 yards and they even can you believe this haters..they eeek GASP! had pavement at some of the event...LAWWD!..anyways it was a sweet time to be a crosser..

looking back on that cold ass morning...in December no one had even a chance to have a monkey on there back yet..and  less than 83 riders went out and braved the shit..a dry but cold course saw The lil Pony who was just starting his reign as a Miscene legend win a hard fought battle over Fast Russ Tiles with over a minute to spare ..The Eagle Adams a formidable crosser BITD finished 3rd..while some 16 year old kid named Brent Bookwalter came in 4th..two future state champions were pack filler and would get there day in years to come...that  sucka the Black Ace already dam old.... beat the at the time a lucrative paying masters field..Friday 15s  Jody Koch won the womens race over Shari Hausbeck and some old bird named Ann Schwartz had started creepin...damm..it was a good time in the scene..who woulda thought B race winner the Wiz woulda went on to become a USGP champion...and Joberon Brewchamp...well that guy hell he went to become a drinking god in these parts...and god dam whatta about Joe Brown..yes indeed alot has come and gone since the stork dropped off a gift for us to create....design and make as our own alter of cross tow worship...

wonder what the WIZ is doing...

In The Name of Tragedy

Its a sad but true statement....all or nothing..cuz no one really cares... who cares who came in second in the scope of the big little picture... no one cares your the state champion of the a sport no knows two shits about..thats ok since the only one who it should matter to is your fucking self..and to be able to come to grips with the name of Tragedy like a man..you must know how to die like a man..but thats god dam hard thing to do when your man pants are constantly getting stuck up your ass...I had this whole laid out plan of giving my worthless worn out opinions and predictions of who is the favorite hotshoes for this weekend...but i was told by the management otherwise....keep it brief leave room for others..

 the nod goes to Burke...its now or never...that man has been killing it outta state all season
 against some fast mother fuckers...Bunny is gonna have a hard time bouncing in the slop...Hoe-fee..is gonna earn some serous respect taking down Burke...watch out for the Pony..thats all im gonna say...he's the best dancer in the scene in the slop..

old men..its a monkey thing...
In The Name of Tragedy                                                                                      I aint done yet

1. Emmet
2.Potts
3.Woodring
4.Koch
5.Vicary
6.Matlock
7.Wilson
8.Collins
9.Schmidt
10.Vanabema
11.Staufer
12.Schubel
13.Hausbeck
14.Stephans
15.Patterson

more addicting than heroin and pussy 

Tao of T

not putting square pegs in round holes

 knowing when to duck...

knowing how to adapt...

Fast and Loose

You can read right? don't blame me...or the shitty grammar..it aint my crime you cant comprehend?

I agree fuckers...there are way too many fucking dudes scared to pull up there man pants....
Yea...that shit can mean whatever the fuck you want..just like Fast and Loose...like The Hurricane in the dome back in the late 1970's...the conditions of the local loop...the red head at Gus's... the 12 pack of Sliders after a nite with Chris...the old green apple two steps..the Pony ridn away...the way i like my woman....comprehend?
Im puttin my Brazil funds that some one is gonna step down and stop the crooked bastard from posting "another' win....oh and the old B men crew..this one is gonna be fuckin good... Old Man Gooch against The Diesel...my only fucking concern is who's gonna step down..Gooch better step it up and stop punching clown...whatever happend to the "cross guy"?...

think about it you bastards...there are mines all over..over there..over there and watch out those god dam monkeys bite...

the brotherhood of man

If you think this is the normal "help me fucking understand the things that cant understand" Tuesdays with Lemmy...your wrong............ If you think you are too old to rock and roll then you fucking are too old.....if you think you cant do shit for whatever pathetic reason ...then you fucking cant.......if you think this place is for posers wanna be-pro take me to the next level and give me the pro-deal free sunglasses and helmet hook up...stop playing the game..., strava loving, racing down sand fucking baggers for what ever reason... crawl in a grave shallower than your  narrow mind...if you think for one millisecond i give too shits about the big picture your fucking wrong...i dont care about my fucking grammar either....if you think just cuz i havent been around kicking shit off my shit kickers and sniffin glue listening to Night Songs your farthest from the truth your kidding your self about..Im always gonna be here i dont need religion and dont need to pull any punches...if you fucking had the cents of billy goat you wouldn't either.four days out..and still weeks away....lets hope you've assembled the pieces properly..

join me later for round one...

all week long 

If a guy had to put a five dollar bill on a guy at this late in the game that had the highest likely number and would be the favorite a week out of the earliest state championship we have scene in many years this guy would put this guy at the top of the list...with the one another guy stays mia...

sittin on the front at an estimated number...
1. Tom Burke....................................................................................................................................

2. coming in at number two..which would be number 3 if that one guy wudnt MIA is Scott Hoffener..coming off a few solid weeks of beating up on the guys that didnt travel outta state, and not to forget a good ICEMAN result... Hoe-fie... only magnified by his great handling skills has made the numbers look even easier...the beauty of being  young..ad +10% for his sweet looking kit

3. Number 3 would be 4..but since that guy is MIA he is three all the same..the Lil Pony..the oldest and one of the last old guard still pinning em on his numbers are the lowest of anyone in this final installment..probably more like the recent..but what the pony lacks in watts he makes up for as being the BEST bike handler of this time period...light weight..and highly skilled, and experience...lethal..at 45..

4..RC Ron Catlin..dont know if he is even gonna keep showin but that dude is Badass...nuff said

5. Bryan Underwood....even 310-15

6.Parma-chicken...what happened...

7.Wonder what the Wiz is doing?

8. DC hey...get your ass up here

9.Chad Wells...

10..I am at ten and this ius pretty fucking bad...i can even find anymore to pull...next week is gonna be well...what it is...

1.MATTER
2.ScottyQ
3.SIMONSTER
4.Anderson
5.Meyers
6.Wakeley
7.DC
8.Shoeberg
9.Tiles
10.Catlin
11.Tanguy
12.Watts
13.DG
14.Pieterzak
15.Precthl
16.Korienek

Breaking the 300-310 barrier is quite hard especially when your around 290..not weight but actual number..but with that all being said...the quickest way to get faster with questionable numbers is to drop the pounds..With all do respect a person can still perform decently at least in the world of Michiganscne cross at that level..like any thing the curve gets harder the more you try to push it..this one is a toughie taking the "imfamous Saari comeback" out of the equation..Were gonna rather focus on the meat and potatoes of the numbers

sitting in at..
1.DC Don C... Don Cameroon,,..love him, hate him or fear him.....the dude rides well for a guy creepin close to half a century ..it would be a safe assumption that this is right around a solid 310er-320...how does he do it..fuckin dude does it all year...every week ...all week...on yer left cotton mouth coming through pain train.....just ask the Wiz..

wonder what the Wiz is doing right now....

2. Hardest call of the nite...God i wanna say Osgood..ICEMAN W aside...im still tossin him down the the number 3 spot..number is given to Brian Wachlarz...a decent Time triler, good crit racer and ok racer..the guy has won some stuff this year other than just TMS cross..probably the best all arounder in this range...he is probably pretty close to DC's numbers..gonna be a good race at states IOO

3.Jgood..love the guy T might not but TMS does..We dig the whole Rocky all the heart and such...prime example and this with ZERO disrepect..the guy could alot faster being lighter..gotta admit the dude rolls pretty fucking fast for a thick dog..he is the epitome of TMS..doesnt travel much outside...does what works for him..dam we would love to see him drop 30 pounds..we only think he'd be killing dudes..

4.Heres a prime example..BigMac leading the series no one really wants..but that's cool..its your world you roll in it..another big guy..but racing skinny fast dudes is tough...

5.Colin Snyder may have been bumped a few spots on this list if he could get a fucking helmet that fits or sits straight on his fucking head... fuck....style and personalty go a long way..pro deal that shit either way he is probably near Don Cameroon as well...

6.Patrick Russell ..he's been kinda MIA for a "cross guy"..but after Iceman it would be a safe bet he is hovering in the low 2990's

7.LAKO....aint even gonna go there...

8. Monte Sano..ditto

9. Todd Greene High 280 low 290s....nothin stellar...

10.  Daniel Soltan..never heard of him but he seems formidable as Tmsers go...he's young..when numbers increase as fast as fat old guys pounds..We give him props...he could get better reminds s tms of the Beebee guy...and WTF happened to him  TMS 2014 state champion favorite...

Lets take a look at the 240-to say 280 range...some may say  that after proper testing that  produced a number 280 that rightfully 280 is the threshold wattage...but often certain advisors/coaches would say it is more  like this...280 being the high on the threshold wattage...but more closely related to 260s or even the 250's..this all under the assumption of a 1 hr TT or coming from a test of 30m..TMS by no means is a coach advisor so whats wtf does that says..if we had to give an asshole opinionated judgement call....heres what were we at...

sitting in at around the  280 are mainly riders capable of riding near the front of a Michigan B field.
1.JMAK..yea i know the guy has not had the stellar season he is capable of..but god dam that 1 hr of masters isnt as breathable as some may think...but dropping back down to the B's may seem to easy..caught in purgatory is sometimes worse than hell itself..hang in there

2.I know this lil squirt aint got the numbers it be dam crime not through that Morton kid in here outta shear respect he is traveling and earning it every weekend

3.Tim Faas..Id have to say this guy is solid at that 280 level. A respectable time trial-er and it shows as he often eats through the ailing old men

4.the guy Faas seems to be battling it out with is Goocher..Id say that guy is a solid 265...Not the best bike handler, but he does suffer well..its written all over his face..he is gonna have to find a way or borrow some watts to beat Tim...he aint far behind.....wtf happened to his kid?

5. what about the final spot...Id like to see Pat Robb mix it up alittle more for a guy that has been kinda hiding all season it..he mixed up pretty fuckin sweet

Sometimes the easiest task... often turns into one of the most heinous, bleeding out of your fucking eye sockets, foul smelly turd strewn thing you could ever possibly try to execute...
Euro cross for an example not slighting that American thing but why compare a dingy with PT boat...and Euros are the destroyers of the cross world...take any mid pack euro fuck and they would make a mockery of even the most baddass hotshoe's ya know...Real badass Euro fucks ..guys like Nys, Pauwels, Van Der Haar etc..make shit look so effortless and easy whether its running.. rolling a big gear or riding across sand pits that some naive sceners say.."is that really cross"............. easy as 1,2,3 ..kinda like wattage...what seems so simple when your looking at it on that idiot box on your own terms turns to the most godawful experience when its being dictated to you by others..is it a false perception? are you doing it right?..not discrediting what we have to work with here..we got we we got......kinda like wattage..ya got what ya got... So how did TMS come up this whole power ranking shit...its simple...lets compare "it" to the now staggering "official" series we have on our hands...looking at the overalls are tad misleading..one would think the leaders are the leaders right?? ..not necessarily...but who the fuck i am fooling if you come to this shitty blog..your aware of that right? ...breaking the whole thing down in a n easy to understanding way..we need a base line..so lets use a simple number of say..240 to start our ranking system....someone in passing said i shouldn't go any lower than the 240 range...cuz that be like the whole equal pay thing...



stay with with me on this...

Yea its that fucking time again..like flogging a dead horse..or like  that shitty John Butcher Axis album that skips mid way through my favorite fucking song...

Coming up in the next few days Its Another opinionated segment of the infamous Michiganscene power ranking..here we are bad grammar... missing commas mispellings...and not giving two fucking shits whether your cringing in your opinionated over priced chair and at the job that brings soo much joy......I DONT CARE...but i do find humor and keep my mind entertained with how this years local scne that seems like it can hardly produce enough pulse to turn itself over ever week is going....dont go gettin all mad face..i know theres 5% that put forth the effort..so that's why its time to go again.....so before let it roll i just wanna say thanks for those that have returned to a scene that was in a similar state not more than nine months ago...like a good friend said lets keep the spirit alive on this day...and lets let it carry us through the next few number of weeks..

check back soon muther fuckers

now

No 202 on the Badass list

A FOUR PART SERIES

 STARTING THIS WEEK