1. 100 plus mile rides
2. In full race team kits, or the latest in neon fashion 
3. Gravel routes with at least 3 or more friends
4. Frequently stopping for...
5. The finest gas station edibles 
6. Racing every week
7. Carbon wheels with a minimum depth of 50 mm
8. Well into the 3 digit Strava kudos
9. The finest quality pictures 
10. Eye wear costing more than there first bike
11. Goofy, articulate and appropriate nicknames 
12. Skilled in the many disciplines of the world of cycling 
13. Seemingly unlimited bank roll
14. Witty social media ride titles
15. A signature gesture 
16. Glorified crashes 
17. Minimum 3 platform social media presence 
18.  Zero off days
19. No bad days
20. Seemingly tireless energy amount

The key go to triggers for the cyclist anxiety.